I am never one that makes a lot of New Year Resolutions. I may think about things that I need to change, need to add or need to remove, but as far as actually acting on them for more than one day, I’m not sure that I have ever made it to day two of a resolution at the beginning of a New Year.
This year (all 2 days of it), I keep pondering what I need to do differently. I even sent Nathan an email today asking him if he wants to make some resolutions with me. Like a normal guy, I think he probably thought to himself that this is just another one of my crazy ideas to get us healthier and to make us all love one another more as we share another year together. And, perhaps that is what it is, but I pray that the me in 2014 will be a different me.
I pray that me in 2014 will be me serving God in the journey He has created for me. I am excited to enter this year knowing that I am finally serving God in my profession in a way that I know for sure He wants to use me. With this excitement, also continues a sense of fear that my family has endured since I left my much higher paying job in September 2012. There are times, even today, that I ask myself why I did this to my family? Why did I create a situation that makes us have to watch our pennies instead of make more? Why when those around me are doing more, making more, advancing higher, why did I decide to go backward?
And then, in that same moment, I am reminded –
My Journey is His Journey.
His Passion shall be my Passion.
His Love is to flow through Me.
And this journey . . . is amazing because I am getting to be involved in His work just exactly the way He has planned it for me. And for this, I am in awe. I am so thankful. I am so delighted. (And, sometimes, I even begin to feel sorry for those people that don’t get to feel the joy that I get to feel each day.)
I need reminders like these to know that it’s okay for my New Year resolutions to be big or small, silly or serious. I don’t have to be at the gym every single day. I don’t have to start the Paleo diet tomorrow. I don’t have to have a clean laundry room each night (though my husband would probably love me a lot more). I don’t have to pack an organic lunch for each of my children. I don’t have to do any of these things, but I do have to do these things if God has called me to lead this journey in 2014. Oh dear Lord, I’m praying for an easier journey!!
All of this to say, I get so caught up in making changes to be like others, to be like the success of the world, to lead the journey that the world sees as delightful. But, I am not here to serve this world, I am here to serve God. I am here to delight in my Heavenly Father – my 2014 New Year’s Resolution is to “delight myself in the Lord” (Psalm 37:4). I pray that I will humbly come before His throne daily to ask Him how I may serve him in His journey.
My silly resolution is to blog actively . . . it keeps me going, it keeps me accountable.